Question: “Sugar coating” is not honest. “Tough Love” should be the motive. How to balance?
When I see/hear this type of question I immediately think I’m not doing a good job communicating the intent of this language movement. I will keep trying to get the message across in different ways so that everyone understands what we’re talking about.
Our efforts to change the language of diabetes is not “sugar coating” at all. Diabetes is real, it’s scary, it’s complex, it’s hard, it’s emotional, it’s burdensome, it’s expensive, and it’s dangerous. No one is denying or even discounting any of that.
And we are not seeing results across the board. And people with diabetes feel judged, shamed, blamed, threatened, dismissed, guilted, and coerced. The way health care professionals, friends, family, media, and the general public talk to people with diabetes makes a difference. It has an impact. For many people it leads to self-defeat, discouragement, and even avoidance (avoiding follow up care, avoiding self-care). Regardless, it’s not good.
So the language movement is an effort to change all that, to use messages that build people up, give them hope, and encourage and support them in their daily grind with diabetes. There is absolutely nothing dishonest about this approach.
My response to the question is this: Rather than sugar coating or tough love, use open, honest communication based on facts. Focus on people’s strengths and build on those. Empower people to engage in their diabetes management, and establish trusting relationships where people with diabetes feel safe and supported.
The way we talk to people matters.
*This is the first in a series of questions I was asked at a recent conference that I will answer through this blog.